3

I don't remember much of the pushing stage of my labor with Ezra.

I remember Talin's anxious face, my doula diligently feeding me ice chips and soothing me into a calming rhythm.

I remember the midwife's look of concentration....but to be honest a lot of that time is black.

I think I spent most of that hour with my eyes closed, sinking into myself rather then engaging in what was going on around me.

And, then I had the most incredible feeling I have ever experienced, nothing has come close to matching it....

...I heard the midwife call my name and I opened my eyes to meet the tiny, blinking, baby blues of the boy who would change my life.

As he gazed in confusion around at all of us staring back at him I had no idea that little face would become my entire world.

I don't think I'd fully grasped that I would leave EVERYTHING behind to spend my days, nights, sorrows, joys, laughter, tears, frustration, pride...all of it with this new tiny person who had just slipped out of his quiet dark world to join ours.

I DO remember his wet warm body being laid on my chest. I DO remember him looking up at me. And, I definitely remember the surge of love and absolute contentment I felt as we looked at each other for the first time.

I don't think any mother can forget that feeling!

You're not a baby anymore, my sweet son, you've grown into a kind, loving, adventurous little boy with a hilarious sense of humor and a sensitive heart.

In 3 years you've mastered the control of your body

(you are king of the spring board in gym class),

you've learned to communicate

(yesterday on the beach you told Daddy and I you were feeling "exposed"!

We are always amazed at the words that enter your vocabulary),

You sing like a songbird and attack art projects with a reckless creativity that I wish I possessed. You can read most letters and count to 15.

You know what you like

(anything with wheels and an engine!)

and what you don't

(haircuts, crowds, men dressed up as Santa).

I am in wonder at what that squirming, wrinkled, red person I met on his first day of his existence has become and all that he will continue to blossom into. =)

Happy Birthday Ezra man.

We love you more then you will ever know!